Where'd She go? Again.

Yes, I got "Squam-ed" and then disappeared. Sorry about that, but I do have a good excuse and a note from my mom. My excuse: I have been simultaneously getting divorced AND writing the sequel to Totally Tangled.
I don't recommend trying this at home. It leads to lack of sleep, chemical imbalances, bad skin, weight gain and general chaos and insanity. And that's just from the book. Don't even get me started on the divorce!

I had gone looking for a book about how to get divorced, you know, something like The Idiot's Guide to Divorce. But, no, I never found one that actually made sense. I did, however, get a lot of really good (and lots of bad) advice from friends. The two most useful things I learned are: 1. Get a lawyer.  And 2. There is no such thing as a "friendly divorce." I mean what are you thinking?! If you could argue about the kids, money, schedules, and keeping promises... in a "friendly" way... you wouldn't be getting divorced would you!? Ah well. I did just recently find an excellent book, that sums it all up, called Why My Third Husband Will Be a Dog. It's by Lisa Scottoline of mystery book fame. Her name on the cover is actually what attracted me to the book rather than the title. It's a collection of essays she wrote for newspapers and magazines about her life - including ex-husbands (she calls them "Thing One and Thing Two"), Spanx, mothers, daughters, the King Tut exhibit, and lots of insights about dogs. They are all wickedly funny and many make you think (ouch). In case you are wondering, I am vaguely considering getting a dog (although I am allergic to them). I am NOT considering getting a second husband - I think I am allergic to them too. If anyone has a good recommendation for a dog, please let me know. I don't like dogs that make me sneeze, drool, are scary, can eat my kids, or should have been a cat. If there are any others, PLEASE let me in on the secret.

As for the second excuse, "I was writing a book." - that one has been almost as stressful, but much more pleasant and exciting too. This is one of those stressors that is on your bucket list, but gets turned into a "to-do" list item because of all the other crap that pushes it over there. Do you know what I mean?
At the beginning of the summer, I was so overwhelmed by all the "doors" that were opening around me, that I contacted a creativity coach, who I had worked with in the past. I emailed Judith Godfrey and said "Help! All my dreams are coming true!" It's like my Irish grandfather always said "Be careful what you wish for, you may get it." And isn't that secretly one of our greatest fears? I often find that I will shoot myself in the foot rather than find out what would happen if my idea became a success. So this whole year has been a series of pushing my limits to see what might happen if I actually say "Yes!" to the things I have always wanted. This is really scary stuff and impossible to plan for. If a door opened, in the past I would say "I don't have time" or "I don't know how to do that" or some other excuse, and just walk past. I have been daring myself to at least look through the doors now, if not take a step through. But what I am finding is an entirely NEW hallway filled with doors behind EACH of those opening doors. Can you imagine the excitement... and the horror? If you follow this analogy, you can see how easy it is to get lost and overwhelmed. The divorce may seem like a sudden and shocking thing to many of you. But in reality, it is just anther door that I have been tiptoeing past for years. And writing books? I joined SCBWI (Society of Childrens Book Writers and Illustrators) when I was 15 years old - back when they were still "SCBW" no "I" yet. I sent my picture books out to dozens of editors for years and years before I gave up. I think I was just wandering around the wrong hallway.

So, this second book started out as one thing, then Suzanne asked me to put it on hold and write a sequel to Totally Tangled... and last night, as I was desperately trying to lay out the pages... I realized, crud! It's not all going to fit into 52 pages! I have amazing work from a ton of different Zentangle artists and the last thing I wanted was to cut anything they had done. So I started cutting all the stuff that I had drawn. My projects, my ideas... at midnight I threw some stuff across the room and stomped out of the studio. You see where some of the stress comes into play here? Abundance can be very stressful! The book is technically due at the end of the month, and my husband had the kids for the past five days, so I have done nothing but work on this book. Today I take over mommy duties again, and I have two weeks left til book deadline (and the divorce changes take effect too) and I feel like a wild animal caught in the headlights. Have I mentioned I'm not good with last minute things? I went to bed completely panicked.

This morning, I jumped out of bed with the horrible realization that what I actually had was... TWO BOOKS! That's a good thing, right? An overabundance of material that can become two separate books is a good thing. It's a good thing! It's good.... good.... good...

Squam-ed!

I'm home! I am so glad to be back in a warm, comfy bed, but I am already so home-sick for Squam.
I have never been to an art retreat that was so exhausting (and cold!), but so mind altering. If you get the chance to attend, please go. I met so many new friends - I wish I could have brought a few home to play with.

Rustic. Just assume that it will be freezing cold and your room will only have open screens on the windows... and you will be fine. Yes, sleeping in a hat and scarf does help.

Oh what a view! (from our cabin's screen porch.)

Squam Lake has lots of little inlets - the camp sprawls around a bunch of them.

"Sticks & Stones" Class - we had a half hour to integrate some clay into the environment.

"Sticks & Stones" - mud creatures.

"Sticks & Stones" - next we had to create something out of sticks. I made a temple for a horned stick god I found in the woods. The pathway is made from chips of mica. It looked much more impressive in real life.

"Sticks & Stones"- close-up of the horned stick god.

"Sticks & Stones" - my big installation was an archway with a pinecone carpet. It seemed like a good idea at the time... but I couldn't feel my fingertips for 2 days after bending down the saplings and tying all those knots.

This is Brandi - she does amazing pet portraits (www.paintedrabbit.com)

"Painting in a Day"- I re-interpreted my mud creatures onto canvas with acrylics and torn paper. Now they are roguish slugbabies.

And one more time. The slugbabies have gone cute. Well, cuter.

The last class was "Three Tools"- I learned to use a jigsaw, a drill and a tape measure (and a hammer!) I decided to make a dining table for my ... ah, my daughter's dolls. I learned to woodburn too!

I brought the table back to the cabin and sat in the sunshine painting it until it was too dark to see anymore. Aah life is good.

Sat. night was the Squam Art Fair. Large blocks of glowing ice lined the walkways.

Jonatha Brooke was selling her albums (and dressed in bottle caps). She is so amazing. She sang us a bunch of songs she wrote with Woody Guthrie. :-)  If you aren't hip to music, ask your kids, she even has a track on "Tinkerbell and the Lost Treasure" - oooh!

The Square Peg Breakfast Club. Funny how the introverts tend to eat near the edges of the dining room. Caryn, Shelly, Carrie, Me, Retta. There were a few others who were fun dining companions, but they didn't survive til Sunday morning.

A Squidoo Lens of My Book!

Ragged Edge has done a really nice "Lens" with a review of my book, Totally Tangled!
How exciting! And now you are mostly wondering, "What the heck is a lens?" That is best answered by exploring the site. Go look!

Meanwhile... Back at the Master Class...

Yes, it's a little late, but I finally took some quick pics of what I created at the Zentangle Master Class in Newport, RI in August. I really loved working on the illuminated letter. I did a "Bee" for Bartholomew and, of course, for "Beez Ink Studio".  It took FOREVER to fill in all the sections two days, plus I stayed up until 2am the last night) - this piece is about 13" wide and twice that tall. We were to color in our central letter section with tasteful, muted shades of watercolors... I'm not very good at "tasteful." I like bright and juicy, so I used my Inktense pencils and I really love the way it turned out.
The second piece was even larger, but our tangles were drawn bigger too. I love doing highlights and shadows, so this was a blast. Though I didn't actually... like... my piece until I added the little pile of Jetties at the bottom and the few slipping out of the main design. I think it is my illustrator's nature to need some kind of a "story." Speaking of stories, if you ever get a chance to talk with Rick or Maria, be sure to ask them where the name "Jetties" comes from! You will be very amused.

Yes, it does rather look like a shopping cart! (Unintentional).

Close up detail of Jetties pile

If you are sorry that you couldn't be at the workshop, you are in luck! Suzanne McNeil (from Design Originals) made an incredible video (actually 2 parts) that she posted on YouTube. I'm interviewed in Part A. Most of us spent a few hours being terrified to appear on camera for a few minutes. :-) Yes, I am camera shy. Oh and be sure to watch Part B too as there are lots of actual demos on how to draw some new Tangles, done by the CZTs. If you watch the videos in a hot, humid room, it will feel like you were actually there with us! But seriously, if they offer this Master Class next year, SIGN up ASAP! (Unless you are a "traditionalist" Zentangle fanatic. In which case you would hate it. Tee hee).

Zentangles of Healing

Hey all, I got permission from Mary Ann to reprint her email letter here on my blog. I love the idea of creating Zentangles to help others heal. And I believe that it really does help... and it certainly doesn't HURT! So if you have a moment tomorrow, send healing, protective thoughts to Mary Ann, and if you have two moments ;-D create a tangle for her too. And by the way, Mary Ann is a "Totally Tangled" artist, a really cool lady, and one of my role models. So let's take care of her with our thoughts and prayers. Cheers!

"It's MaryAnn here, from CZT class #1.  I recently found out that I have a couple of nodes growing in 2 sections of my lungs that shouldn’t be there.  It’s been decided that they have to be removed and the date set for that is Sept. 7^th.   Since I've had a bit of time to prepare for it, I’ve been using a program called Prepare for Surgery and Heal Faster by Peggy Huddleston (google her name if you want to know more about it, it's excellent for anyone having surgery, big or small).  It endeavors to bring focus on the positive aspects of what’s happening and so I’m trying to come up with some creative approaches to this. 

One of the exercises is to picture yourself first as you are healing and then again already healed, doing something you love to do.  Well, that’s an easy image…. making and teaching Zentangle!  I’m hoping some of you can help me with this.  If you would, pick a date between Sept. 7^th and October 7^th and on that day send me one of your tangled tiles.  Each day, I plan on feeling better and better, stronger and stronger until I am healed and whole again (this could take a couple of months but I’m being optimistic!  LOL)  And, as each Zentangle arrives, with its love and healing energy stored up in the Tangles, I will be building a mosaic of strength and support from my Zentangle friends and colleagues.  (mailing address is below)

I plan on journaling my journey down this road and hope to use my recovery time to continue to grow personally and professionally.  Maybe by using Zentangle as part of my recovery “tools”, I’ll be able to learn to help others use it too and I’ll share that with y’all.

I’m also having a prayer circle begin praying for me ½ hour before my surgery time.  If you wish to participate, please begin 8am Sept. 7^th and while you are praying or just sending postive energy (in whatever fashion you are comfortable with) please imagine that you are wrapping me in a beautiful Southwestern Indian blanket of love.  The actual visualization of that image will help you to focus the energy.  That’s it.  Thank you so much.

As soon as possible after the surgery, I'll send out an email update.

"WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS, MAKE LEMONADE!"  (or Zentangles!)

With greatfulness and affection

MaryAnn, CZT (Class #1)"

MaryAnn Scheblein-Dawson
Origami Specialist and Certified Zentangle Teacher

217 Hoffman Street

Franklin Square, NY  11010

Good Times in the Graveyard

Pardon my recent obsession with graves... but here's another update.
Yesterday was my grandmother's birthday. And although I love Harry Potter as much as the next 40 year old with the reading level of a 12 year-old, I did not celebrate Gram's "Death Day" with a party this past spring. In my mind, she is still the funny, silly, brave, ALIVE woman whom I admire and miss so much. Not the freaky-screaming-shell who vaguely resembled my Grandma on a really bad day. So which one would I rather celebrate?

Since she has a new stone, and it was her birthday, I coaxed my kids, my mom, and my mother-in-law out to the graveyard for a little picnic. My son and I had made a chocolate cake (Gramma loved chocolate) and we all ate until we were sugar crazed. Lilah took off running around the cemetery like a banshee and Ellie trailed after her. I had been disappointed that Gramma was buried in this new cemetery - no old interesting stones, no trees, just lots and lots of empty grass and an occasional altar with beer bottles or flowers... but now I realized this was the perfect spot. I didn't have to say"be careful, don't step on...." because it was mostly empty. So go ahead and run, burn that sugar rush! Meanwhile, Alex and I built a marshmallow "cake" into the shape of a heart and I wrote on it with frosting. The ants thought they had died and gone to heaven! Maybe Waterloo Cemetery is actually the Valhalla for ants? Well, it was yesterday. And after a week of steady, dreary rain, Gramma had somehow managed to conjure up an absolutely perfect sunny, cool day.

It really was one of the nicest parties I have been to in a long time! And I was imagining that, after the sun set, a small brown bear would wander out of the trees and gobble down the remaining marshmallows. Then she'd sit herself down against the bench, with her picture on it, and have a little snooze. She'd dream about a lady with lovely smooth, pink skin, mischievous blue eyes surrounded by laugh lines, and the heart of a bear. And for that minute, the bear would wonder 'Am I a woman dreaming of being a bear, or a bear dreaming that I am a woman?' And my Grandmother would look down from where she is watching and have a good laugh.

Tangle on... and on... and on...

Wowza! Sandra Strait has published a list of all the Tangle names she could find from the web, the books and the official Zentangle site and kits... take a look at her blog! It's a great way to see if a name has already been used when you are designing your own Tangles. And Sandra, I'm assuming you do not have any small children still at home, right. Otherwise, you have WAY too much free time on your hands! (yep, I'm jealous - but I love lists!)